Dope Sick Girl [entries|friends|calendar] Jessika <3 [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Dolla Dolla Bill Yall' [02 Sep 2009|10:24pm] [ mood | stressed ] [ music | Drake- Successful ] [Intro - Trey Songz] The money (money), the cars (cars) The clothes (clothes), the hoes, I suppose... yeah! [Chorus - Trey Songz] I want the money, money and the cars Cars and the clothes, the hoes, I suppose I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful [Verse 1 - Drake] Drizzy Aw yeah, Trey I fuckin' feel ya They be starin' at the money like it's unfamiliar I get it, I live it, to me there's nothing realer Just enough to solve your problems, too much'll kill ya And when I leave I always come right back here The young spitter that everybody in rap fear Alot of ya'll are still sounding like last year The game need change and I'm the motherfuckin' cashier Nickels for my thoughts, dimes in my bed Quarters of the kush shave the lines in my head Take my verses too serious, you'll hate me Cause I'm the one to paint a vivid picture, no HD Yeah, I want it all, that's why I strive for it Diss me, you'll never hear a reply for it Any award show or party, I get fly for it But I know that it's coming, I just hope that I'm alive for it [Chorus - Trey Songz] I want the money, money and the cars Cars and the clothes, the hoes, I suppose I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful [Verse 2 - Drake] Yeah, I want things to go my way But as of late, alot of shit been going sideways And my mother try to run away from home But I left something in the car and so I caught her in the driveway And she cried to me, so I cried too And my stomach was soaking wet, she only 5'2" And 48 hours all before I showed up And brought a thousand dollars worth of drinks and got poored up Damn, my reality just set in And even when the pantoms leased, them hoes wanna get in I do alot of things hoping I never have to fit in So try to keep up with my progress, it's like a dead-end My girl love me, but fuck it my heart beats slow And right now the tour bus is looking like a freak show And life change for us every single week so it's good, but I know this ain't the peak though cause I want the [Chorus - Trey Songz] I want the money, money and the cars Cars and the clothes, the hoes, I suppose I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful [talking] Alright well uh, aight Why don't you put that fucking cigarrette out .... Making it to the top, all the way to the top You need to go for the money, and not the money you know what I'm saying Hahahaha, you know what I'm saying? [Verse 3 - Drake] Uh, why is words from a decent man Back when I was trying to put a ring on Alicia hand This lost boy got fly without Peter Pan And my delivery has got me buzzing like the Pizza Man In-person I am everything and more I'm everywhere these other niggas never been before But inside I'm treading water, steady trying to swim to shore I'm on a shopping spree to get whatever is in store Yeah, just call me "Shopping Bag Drizzy" Or call me "Mr. Damn, he ain't coppin' that, is he?" And fans that he freshmen, it's about to get iffy While this young'n that you doubted is about to get busy I'ma kill it, I promise, that's how I know ya mad I've always treated my city like some shoulder pads The big homie, use a flash if you must And I swear I ain't asking for much, all I want is the [Chorus - Trey Songz] (Drake & Lil Wayne) I want the money, money and the cars Cars and the clothes, the hoes, I suppose I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful (D: yeah, that's all I want man) I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful (W:you gotta tell 'em Trey) I just wanna be, I just wanna be successful [Drake talking] Yeah, it's like I, it's like I know what I wanna say I just don't know how to say it... to you [Verse 4 - Lil Wayne] Uh Pardon the swag, but bitch it's Car-tey Long bread, I don't eat shortcake, how come I can't miss a woman like I can't miss court dates Cheese, but she's not in this portrait And yeah, life's fine, but I don't portray I'm on the other side, but it is a short gate I don't want the glow, I want the glo-ray And I'ma fuck the world, but this is just foreplay Tired of hearing bullshit, bring on the cow shit Haven't met a smell that's stinkier then our shit Haha, and that's word to Toronto So high up, I got birds in the condo Ha, ain't that a female dog Ask her who I am to her, and she yell "God" Weezy Baby, I go re-al hard No further details boy *Seasons Change*

[25 Aug 2009|08:15am] [ mood | contemplative ] It kind of scares me when my horroscope is so accurate, so I just want to write a little about it. The phone will probably start ringing bright and early this morning -- and you really shouldn't ignore it. There's someone due to ring you up who has quite the news to share, and maybe even a romantic question to ask. Oh, and if the phone doesn't ring, don't just sit there. Make the call yourself. Who cares if it's you or they who make the first move? -Libra wow. how odd. kym called me early as hell then I called work to see if I needed to show up early for catering... That old adage about being careful what you wish for, or you just might get it? Pay very close attention to what you say you want and what you honestly desire during the first half of the week. The more honest you are about all of the wishes in your heart and soul, the easier it will be to gain your objective. On Thursday and Friday, you're able to view yourself with clear-eyed detachment and compassion, and that helps a light go off in your brain: Now you know what you truly need. The weekend is great for figuring out what steps to take to get there. -libra (weekly)   *Seasons Change*

Sing your heart out.. [03 Jul 2009|01:34am] Moms on vacation and while she's gone, were hangin out here enjoying the high speed internet and cable..playing some sing star and hanging out. I called Boston Market back today and I have an interview Saturday so we'll see how it goes.. *Seasons Change*

Did I just get ripped off..? [01 Jun 2006|08:08am] [ mood | jubilant ] So here I am again in school, in a class with 3 other people in it.  But I'm going to enjoy the shit out of the day. It's pretty gloomy looking outside right now which is unfortunate considering that this past week has been nothing but effing sunshine.  Superb. I love summer...it's the only time I have an excuse for bearly wearing any clothes. (ha..) So my boyfriend broke my (new) cell phone (that he bought me in the first place) the other day.  Oh well, now I have his for now.  He told me I could have it and it's really nice but I donno...We only have like 5 days left of school and I am ITCHING to get out of here for the summer.  Most likely it's going to be thee best summer of my life...because it's the last one I'll ever spend without a job or ant real responsibilities.  I'm excited...to never be sober untill I have to go back to school again next year.  :) Just kidding. But really I'm not....? *Seasons Change*

[26 May 2006|08:09am] [ mood | awake ] [ music | Kanye West ft. Ludacris- Breathe In Breathe Out ] Damn did this week suck. I came home on Wednesday and all of a sudden I started to feel like shit. Still felt shitty on Thursday so I left school early, went to my moms and waited for her to get out of work and take me to the doctor. They thought I had strept throat...then they thought I had mono...neither one. I was just sick as hell. So for the past two days I've laid in bed sick. I feel kind of better today but it's Friday so I don't care if I'm sick, I'm still going out tonite. I can't stay at home for days...I get so effin bored. I guess the antibiotics I'm taking can effect birth controll too, but I don't know about mine because I dont take the "pill" Annnnyway..We only have like 8 more days left of school so I donno how the hell I'm gonna post entries on here when we get out (lol) Prolly at Brandon's house. I'm always there anyways. My dad asked me for a joint yesterday..I was so shocked I almost shit myself. but I got him one ;) Im prolly his favorite kid now Damn I am so hungry, I haven't been able to eat since like Tuesday (Shitty~) *Seasons Change*

I was gettin some head [18 May 2006|07:48am] [ mood | cheerful ] So, it's Thursday (wish it were Friday) and I'm waiting for the seniors (who I'm going to miss!) to get finished with their exams. Me and Brandon are probably going to hang out after I get home and stuff...but I donno I have to put some pictures on here of us from prom and everything. I miss u LJ! *Seasons Change*

[16 May 2006|08:17am] [ mood | bored ] Im back. Well, at least for a week or two. Schools almost over and I can't wait. But for now I'm posting from business class. Things are a lot different since my last few entrys. But more on that later...Seniors are leaving in a matter of like two days? Yeah. Im gonna miss them. All for now <3 Jessika 4 Fall| *Seasons Change*

A WHOLE NEW JOURNAL.... [14 Sep 2005|07:51pm] [ mood | amused ] [ music | Bone Thugs- Fo Tha Love of $ ] Well...it's been so long since my last entry, but this journal always kind of made me feel better.  Where should I start? School.  Everyday since school has started has been crazy as hell.  Really, today is the first day I've been home in so long.  Schoolwork, now that's a different story.  I can't believe I'm doing as well as I am.  Well, okay, I guess I can, but it's hard to picture me doing well in school.  It's funny though, because after school, I usually go to Chad and Sean's or hang out with Heather untill she has to go to cheerleading practice.  Me and my man are doing wonderful....despite the old 'issues.'  My life is just so crazy now, so spontanious and unpredictable.  Everyday is an adventure that I find myself looking forward to day after day.  After school, I usually don't have plans, I just do whatever sounds like fun.  I was working at Lucky's Steakhouse for a couple of weeks, but not anymore.. I don't know for sure what happened but I guess I was just too good for them. ^_^  Tomorrow is Thursday, I'm going over Laura's after school and staying the night, but I'll definately update more! That felt SOOOO good! haha <3 Jessika *Seasons Change*

Baby.. [09 Jun 2005|10:02pm] [ mood | hot ] [ music | Destiny's Child- Cater to You ] So today wasn't that bad.  I thought it'd be worse... This morning when my Peach brought her dog over to get groomed, the dog ran away.  So we looked for it for hours and never found it.  I feel so bad for Peach... I hung out w/ Elena a little bit today and she's still as self-centered as she always was.  I got to talk to Brandon periodically today...I miss him a lot, but I know that what we have to do right now is nessecary.  I just hope that absence will make the heart go fonder, instead of making it wander.  I doubt that though, we're in love and it should be obvious by now.  Well, I hope the night will be ended with a long phone conversation.... <3 Jess~ *Seasons Change*

[08 Jun 2005|09:13pm] [ mood | depressed ] I'll have fun alllll by myself this summer.      ...You'll always be worth it though. *Seasons Change*

[15 May 2005|06:18pm] [ mood | lonely ] [ music | Bright Eyes- No Lies, Just Love ] Untill toady, I haven't had the time to update, so here goes. Friday, as everyone probably already knows...I got into a fight w/ Kristy Hoover.  I don't have much to say about it, although..I am glad it happened.  She started it, and normally that would give her a lot of credit.  But after tripping me, and getting a black eye and a cut on her face...everyone knows who really walked away from that one with the respect from everyone in that school who knows about it.  Oh well, I got an early start on my weekend, and I only have 4 days in school.  (See ya in there Kym ) Saturday started out to be really frustrating.  It was prom, and I went with Collins, Frank, and Janelle.  I had a good time when I got there...we left early and went to Lucky's to eat though...the food at Crystal Gardens sucks since they got a new owner.  Today's just such a gloomy and depressing day.  I've been thinking about him constantly.  Last night he asked me why we couldn't just sit there like we were, in eachother's arms- all the time, and I wish more then anything that right now I could do just that.  The main thing I want out of life, is to go home after work or whatever, cook dinner with him, watch TV, do laundry together...nothing special.  I just want to be able to spend my life with someone I care for like I care for him. It'll only be a matter of time untill I can have that though..so untill then I guess I should be satisfied with what I have now. *Seasons Change*

How low can you go? Can you go down low? [12 May 2005|04:59pm] [ mood | amused ] Today was miraculous!  Kristy Hoover actually went home because I kept calling her "Krispy Cooter!" That's fucking hillarious!! Then 6th hour rolls around, and Mrs. Arnold asked me to please stop making fun of her because her mom thought that Kristy was afraid to go to school because she was scared of me!! I laughed so hard because earlier today...she was saying she was going to have Alex bring her over my house to fight me.  What a dumbass. She isn't even worth my time anymore.  For a while there, I was having fun laughing at the little girl's insecurities, now I'm just ashamed.  She hasn't the least bit of self-confidence, I bet she goes home and cuts herself.  How pathetic. I almost feel bad...oh wait, no! I don't! Godammit I should have went tanning today! Such a stoner :) 11 Fall| *Seasons Change*

[11 May 2005|11:27am] The world is a playground for my recreation and everything and everyone in it are just props at my disposal.  I don't want to care about anyone or anything anymore.  Maybe it's the fact that everything I being to develop a love for, ends up somehow being wrong in some sense.  Even if there isn't anything wrong with it, someone forms the opinion that it's wrong, and that someone always happens to be of authority to me.  I don't know what the hell I'm sapposed to do.  Put my life on hold untill I turn 18 and no one can tell me what I can and can't do or who I can and can't talk to.  It's bullshit.  I used to think that I could pass through life in a fantasy, that if I did enough drugs and dreamed hard enough then I could leave this hellish world on a permanent psychedelic holiday.  All the buildings, the advertisements trying to sell me things, they would all drop away and I'd be free.  But the reality is that I'm stuck right here whether I like it or not. I thought I was so fucking clever all the time, always so creative, so spontaneous.  But what the hell am I really doing? Now, I'm beginning to understand it.  The world isn't going to dissolve and leave me alone in a coloring book setting.  And if I can't flee it, the least I can do is fight it.  I'm losing my grip.  I feel like my sanity is sealed off in some safe that hangs from a height by a thin thread, like how the spine is held to the brain. In an instant that wire might sanp, sending that safe sinking into the depths while my mind rises into a mist of uncertainty.  I have no definate plan, no ideas, just hope.  Hope that something will eventually work out for me, and that I don't spend the rest of my life feeling so faintly perceptible as to lack clear delineation. 10 Fall| *Seasons Change*

[08 May 2005|06:09pm] [ mood | hungry ] Damn. Guess you could say that it's been a very adventurous weekend for me.  Friday my dad bought an apartment a couple of miles behind luckys.  Hearing that was probably the most depressing thing I've heard in a long time.  Me and my mom are nothing alike, thus, we should not have to live together.  I solemnly can't believe it.  But my mom stayed the night at Robyn's Friday and dad went out... which left me with the option to do whatever I felt like doing.  To make a long story short, I got stoned and drunk and stuff.  Came home at like 1am all fucked up.  Luckily no one was around.  Did the same thing pretty much last night, but it was all a lot more depressing.  Me and dad got into a fight over something stupid, and it got to me.  Brandon and Mike picked me up, and yeah, it was a fun night after I got done being all emotional/empathetic.  Got fucked up, came home at like 2am.  It was good fun. next saturday: prom w/ collins. oh god. 4 Fall| *Seasons Change*

What the fuck [05 May 2005|03:45pm] [ mood | high ] [ music | Young Buck- Shorty Wanna Ride With Me ] Yesterday was badass.  Me + Jeremy...my 15 sack.  S-T-O-N-E-D.  Got a lot of sleep last night.  Fell asleep at like 4:30.  Today was a little better... I rolled my first free-handed joint ever. Successfully.  I tried to call Frank and Collins to see if they wanted to smoke.  Unsuccessfull.  Smoking is all I really care about anymore.  I mean, well, yeah.  My parents don't want me to talk to Brandon, so I turn to weed a lot more now.  As pathetic as it is, that's like the only thing that can calm me down anymore.  I'm always so fucking tense and stressed from whatever dumb shit just happens to be going on at the time.  I don't know though, I guess no matter what I still have Brandon, but my parents don't want me to talk to him.  I heard my mom told Brandon's mom that she wouldn't care if I was 16, but she said she thought I was too young to be emotionally attatched? I was like wow, yeah because you know, me and Alex didn't go out for 2 fucking years.  What do you call that? A crush? I don't think so.  I know how to take relationships seriously, mom.  Wake the fuck up..I've been through a little more then all the other 14 year old girls in Yale.  God I need to smoke.  *Seasons Change*

[03 May 2005|04:35pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | Ciara- Oh ] Last night helped me a lot.  [Even though I'm "not sapposed to"] I talked to Brandon for a couple of hours on the phone.  I started crying because we were talking about the whole situation, and he gave me a lot of advice that I can tell is gonna help me through all of this.  All I know is, no matter what...eventually, no one can tell me who I can and can't love. School today was a bitch.  Me and my mom got into a fight this morning, so I was in a bad mood. I actually cried after 5th hour too, because Jacobson tried telling me all this shit, and well...I broke down.  *Went tanning *Going to Monique's soccer game *Dance Class 3 Fall| *Seasons Change*

I donno how you what you do, I'm so in love with you [02 May 2005|08:27pm] [ mood | depressed ] [ music | 50 cent- A Baltimore Love Thing ] The one person in my life that makes me happier then anyone ever could, and they want him in jail.  I couldn't express how much that hurts me if I had to..  2 Fall| *Seasons Change*

I'm shedding [28 Apr 2005|05:16pm] [ mood | pessimistic ] [ music | Flaw- Recognize ] Dude, this shit is getting rediculous.  So far, this week has been effin sweet...untill today that is.  Why the fuck does that always happen?  I'm in such a pissy mood.  Kym's comming over so we can go to dinner at like 6.  I'm so hungry right now, I think my stomache might begin to eat itself.  I got a god-damn detention today from Jacobson.  The guy's such a cock.  I'm like his favorite student, and I wigged out on him today for being a shitty teacher, so he gave me after-school for "disrespect."  Does this surprise anyone? I didnt' think so.  Talked to Brandon for like 8 seconds today.  I guess he had work, which sucks.  He said he'd call me, and I know he won't...so I called Frank's ass (forgetting he lost his license) and Brandon was over there.  I guess there was a bunch of people over there because I heard some chick talkin when I called Frank.  I swear, sometimes...I really do wonder what the catch is to having the perfect guy.  Yesterday was great, I absoloutly loved it.  While it lasted.  We didn't talk much, and when I did talk, he seemed kind of annoyed.  I don't know, thinking about him makes me just wanna cry.  We aren't fighting or anything, but he always tells me I can talk to him and stuff, only, when I need him...he's always busy. Such a shitty day.  I just wish it was fucking over with already.  (Even though I doubt tomorrow will be any better)  7 Fall| *Seasons Change*

[28 Apr 2005|03:03pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | Kittie ] I'm sick of this fucking bullshit... "A little sheltered girl, is what I'll always be.  So loving and considerate, too scared of what I'll be.  I look into the mirror, the whore is all I see. Like you, like me, diminished, self-important, I'll never see.  Like you, like me, I never wanted to be like me. Do you think I'm a...whore?" Yesterday was fun.  Good think I'm <3'd. *Seasons Change*

Seriously [25 Apr 2005|10:28pm] [ mood | crappy ] [ music | Omarion- O ] So...today was pretty good.  I thought for sure it was a guarunteed snow day.  I was wrong...(Capac didn't have school though.)  Heh, that's pretty funny thinking about it. A snow day in late April.  I wanted to hang out with Brandon today, and since we did have school...I had to find some way to see him anyways.  In Art, I faked an allergic reaction to the clay by scratching the shit out of myself.  Danny got permission to drive me home and I got permission to leave, so we went to my house and made lunch since we missed it at school.  Then I got ahold of Brandon and we went and hung out with him for a couple of hours.  Me and Danny showed back up at school at like 1:30 and I was pretty messed up.  I came home and did my homework and cleaned a little...but haven't really done anything else.  I was hoping Brandon would be able to call me and stuff tonite, but he's with Frank and Collins. I feel really bad too, because when we got off the phone earlier, he said he'd call me back and that he loved me and I was just like "you too...bye."  +_+  I sent him a text message a little bit ago, but he's driving, so I doubt I get a reply.  I have a hangnail and it hurts like a bitch... Tomorrow I have class...I'm so not looking forward to it.  Blehness.  *Seasons Change*

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